Day 3: Sketchy

Toughest call so far.  I am reminded of my English Literature S Level, where my teacher Mrs Williams had prepared us thoroughly to answer questions on Shakespearian tragedies.  Slightly disturbed on exam day to turn over a paper featuring questions purely on the comedies.  Leaving me with no choice other than to start 'Without black there is no white.  Without tragedy there is no comedy'...  I went on to answer every question from the same angle.  I left the examination hall feeling dirty and ashamed.  But it got me through. 

So, with that in mind... 

Without having visited a well-known nationalistic energy supplier in Staines, I could not fully appreciate the liberty I enjoy as a freelancer.  I am really glad I do not have to book a parking space by the hour, or wear a pass at all times.  I am delighted that my name is not pinned to a notice above my allocated parking space.  I rejoice that I do not forfeit that right to a parking space, if I am 30 minutes late for my booked space.  In having to wear 'business dress' I get the joy of changing into jeans the minute I get home, and hurling my 'tailored slacks' into the corner of the bedroom.  Above all, I am grateful that today reminds me that the sands of time are running low in the hourglass of this particular career strand. 

High above the M25 I spotted a kestrel, perched on one of the overhead motorway lights.  It was motionless, sitting and watching, far above the rush of the cars.  And it reminded me of how much I enjoyed sitting on the fire escape of my old flat in Muswell Hill.  Perched up high, amongst chimney pots and roof slates, able to look down and watch things unfold in the houses opposite.  Like an Advent calendar, with different images at every window.  People drinking tea, chatting, smoking, arguing.  On one occasion, a couple dancing.  Once, a woman in a corset.  They so rarely looked up.  I was free to observe.  A crow in a nest. 

And so I am grateful to the kestrel.  For reminding me that on days like this, all I need to do is find a still and quiet perch, high up in my head, where I can find peace and perspective, as the traffic rushes past below.

I'm there.  Breathe.